You love your kids. Obviously. They’re adorable, hilarious, and occasionally let you drink a cup of tea while it’s still hot. But if we’re being brutally honest—sometimes you miss the old you. The one who didn’t consider a solo trip to Asda “me time.” The one who had hobbies that didn’t involve cutting someone else’s food into tiny pieces.
Good news: She’s still in there.
You don’t need a weekend spa retreat or a five-step morning routine to start feeling like yourself again (although, let’s be real, we wouldn’t say no). Sometimes, small, doable changes can help you reclaim your sanity—even in the chaos of mum life.
1. Reclaim Something That’s Just Yours
Remember hobbies? Before your life was a never-ending loop of “Where are your shoes?” and “Don’t lick that!”—you had things you enjoyed.
It doesn’t have to be something elaborate, like taking up pottery or writing a novel (unless you want to, in which case, go for it, Queen). It could be as simple as:
✅ Reading a book that isn’t about Peppa Pig.
✅ Listening to YOUR music in the car (sorry, Cocomelon).
✅ Starting a little passion project (like a blog… ask me how I know 😏).
Whatever it is—make it yours. No guilt. No interruptions. Just you, reclaiming a tiny piece of your identity.
2. Get Out of Survival Mode (Even Just for 10 Minutes)
You know that feeling when you’ve been ‘on’ all day and your brain just… stops working? The kids are finally asleep, the house is quiet, and instead of doing something for yourself, you stare at your phone until it’s suddenly midnight.
Yeah. We’re breaking that cycle.
You don’t need an hour of self-care—just 10 minutes of doing something that actually refuels you.
✔ A quick yoga stretch (or just lying on the floor like a starfish).
✔ Drinking a coffee without reheating it four times.
✔ Writing, doodling, or journaling—because yes, your thoughts matter.
✔ Staring at a wall in complete silence and contemplating your life choices. (No judgment, we’ve all been there.)
The point is, you need time to just be YOU. Not “Mommy,” not “wife/partner,” not “human snack dispenser”—just you.
3. Say No Without Feeling Like a Monster
I need you to hear me on this: You are not legally required to bake cupcakes for the PTA.
Or attend every school event. Or sign up for every committee. Or say yes to that thing you really don’t want to do.
“No” is a complete sentence. Try it. It’s liberating.
And if you must soften the blow, go for:
✔ “I’d love to, but I just can’t commit right now.”
✔ “That sounds amazing, but I’m fully booked (with ‘not losing my mind’).”
✔ “No, thank you.” (My personal favourite—short, sweet, and impossible to argue with.)
Saying no means saying yes to yourself. And honestly? You deserve that.
4. Wear the Nice Outfit (Even If You’re Staying Home)
Look, I love comfy leggings and oversized jumpers as much as the next mum, but let’s talk about the power of wearing a real outfit.
You know—the one that makes you feel like an actual human being.
I’m not saying you need to go full glam just to do the school run, but try putting on something that makes you feel put-together and confident. Even if you’re just staying home. Even if no one sees you but the delivery guy. You’re worth the effort.
✔ Throw on the nice jumper.
✔ Do your hair (even if it’s just dry shampoo and a messy bun).
✔ Wear perfume—yes, even if your only plan is making another round of dinosaur nuggets.
Sometimes, how we dress is how we feel. And when you look like you’ve got your life together… you start to believe it.
5. Let Go of the Mom Guilt (It’s a Scam, Anyway)
You know that feeling that you should be doing more, being more, giving more? That little voice in your head whispering, “You should be playing with the kids instead of scrolling right now.”
Yeah, that’s mom guilt. And it’s lying to you.
Mom guilt will tell you that taking time for yourself is selfish. That you should always be doing something “productive.” That you’re a terrible parent if your kid has too much screen time one day.
But here’s the truth: You are already doing enough.
✔ Your kids don’t need a perfect mom—they need a happy one.
✔ Taking care of yourself is taking care of them.
✔ Rest is productive. (Let’s say that again for the people in the back.)
So, whatever guilt you’re carrying today? Drop it. You’re doing an amazing job.
You Deserve to Feel Like YOU Again
Motherhood is beautiful, messy, exhausting, and wonderful. But you don’t have to lose yourself in the process.
Start small. Pick one thing from this list. Make space for yourself again. And remember—you’re not alone in this.
I’m right there with you, figuring it out one day (and one lukewarm cup of coffee) at a time.
Let’s Chat! 💬
What’s one small way you take time for yourself? Tell me in the comments—I need new ideas! 😆
And if you enjoyed this post, stick around—there’s lots more coming soon!
Until next time,
Jordan 💛
